NORMALISING THE NORMAL.

When I was a teenager I lived in a community where dressing as a boy was termed ‘cool’ when you sag your nicker or when you wear a ‘pencilled’ trouser.

I came to believe that this is simply the best way to live life and that if I don’t participate on that dress code then I am not ready to mingle with the big boys. I would be called a pastor if I had dressed responsibly; my trouser up to my waist and my clothe neatly ironed.

It became obvious that I was tempted to dress accordingly like them so I could feel ‘belong’. It almost became part of me: I sag my clothe. Do you know what? I liked it. Dressing that way came with a feeling that I am on top of the world not knowing that I just got lower.

However, after short term of experiencing the ‘feeling fly’ feeling I became to query my decisions after my mother disciplined me on the cause of that dress code. Not that she disciplined me with cane or something of that sort but with words that gave me reasons to be a better teenager and become a better personality come future. You know mothers; those, who their words or eyes could reset you to your default.

I endured their words that almost shattered my thoughts to living a responsible life and took the words of my mother that changed me into a role model for others coming up.

Truth be told, there are certain things that the society has termed ‘cool’ when in every sense it is so ‘uncool’. The likes of dressing, respect, responsibility, and honour. It’s all wrong and not ‘cool’.

Dressing almost naked and rugged so you can impress the mass is wrong. Respecting someone because of what they have and not who they are is wrong. Recognising someone who is irresponsible to be responsible because of his wealth or influence is wrong. Honouring someone who doesn’t deserve to be honoured is wrong. These are not normal.

Let us “Normalizes the Normal” and forget the abnormal where it was. It has done more harm than good; broken dreams, changed mindsets and disconnected the future from the hands of the real owners.

This is amongst many options to be considered in restoring the dignity of human existence as a society. Let’s fix this issue before it gets to a point where we see the abnormal as the normal and then, the Normal as the abnormal.

Dear one,

Normalise the Normal!

Thank you for reading. Feel free to spread the word: your friend needs it. Cheers!


READ ALSO: LOVE IS BEAUTIFUL WHEN SHARED.


LOVE IS BEAUTIFUL WHEN SHARED.

Love is a beautiful thing when shared.

St. Paul gave a vivid example of it’s beauty when shared.

He says:

Love is patient and kind; it is not jealous or conceited or proud; love is not ill-mannered or selfish or irritable; love does not keep a record of wrongs; love is not happy with evil, but is happy with the truth. Love never gives up; and its faith, hope, and patience never fail.  Love is eternal. (1 Corinthians 13:4‭-‬8 GNB)

From the above you can notice that their are other parties that makes this love worthy of being called what it is.

Those parties when involved is what makes Love beautiful.

Take for an instance on the scenario of God Loving man that He gave up His son for the redemption of man.

That’s a vivid example of the beauty of Love.

The story of St. Valentine defines this too to be a beautiful thing to share Love.

Also, your mom and dad is an example that Love is beautiful when shared; you reading this is a result of that beautiful love shared.

Love is beautiful when shared…

Sharing is synonymous to giving.

So, we can say that Love is beautiful when we give.

By giving you commit your compassion to the well being of the receiver.

What can you give?

What you have: Wisdom, Knowledge, Material possession, Goodness, Kindness, Love and anything worth giving.

Giving to someone is like taking the responsibility of caring for the need at hand.

Therefore, we can say that Love is responsibility.

Sharing is caring.

There is love in sharing.

Love is beautiful when shared.

Shalom!

A Message to the Parents – Episode Three


Few weeks ago they had a festival: masquerades came out in their numbers and beautiful colours.

This week, on my way to a destination, I saw them: children. The oldest was 8 and the youngest was 4 or a year less, mimicking the masquerades on a ‘some kind’ lonely road.

One covered with a blue clothe designed with some sticks to make the crown’s veil long. This had a square like sticks arranged on the edge with some thread dropping from the square.

The other made a head tie and flipped it forward to look like a veil.

At sight, I cautioned them immediately and warned them to go back home and drop them.

It fell on deaf ears. But since words sometimes can’t discourage a child talk more of children, I kept quiet and looked away the second time I passed through the road despite their masquerading noise to get my attention.


READ ALSO: A message to the parents – Episode two


The third time I passed, they weren’t there. They had left to someplace close to where I was going to. Though they weren’t engaged in it. I hope they will never be engaged in such.

What made them left there was my lack of attention to their stupidity and acclaimed fun. If I had praised and hailed them for their nonentity, they would have gloried in it and their sense will automatically approve it as something worth dying for.

Children of about 1 – 15 on the average ‘Listens’ to actions. This is why you don’t need to explain ‘so much’ to them before they assimilate; sometimes you need to ACT for them assimilate. It sinks better.

Dear Parents,

Train your child in a way, through a path, so that when they grow up you won’t have to regret taking them along.

It is not easy, simple or simply easy. But, IT IS WORTH IT!


READ ALSO: A message to the parents – Episode one


A message to the parents – Episode two

Nothing gives me joy like seeing a family that stays together. Especially when the parents are having a good time with their children.

Chai. That alone is wonderful. Very wonderful.

Just yesterday a friend uploaded a video of him having a good time with his boys. I was so happy.

About a month ago too, my classmate in the secondary days uploaded a video on his WhatsApp status of his Dad having a good time with his siblings over there in the abroad. I was so happy.

I love seeing family having a good time together. It gives me ripples of joy and happiness. And I must commend all family living together and peacefully and lovely. Especially parents bringing out time to spend quality time with their children.

Let me tell you something really.

What they are doing now may look like a waste of time to some people but trust me, that little time spent with them gives those children a level of confidence that no one else can take.

If you only know the pain of growing up without a father, you will care less of what the society is saying and spend quality time with your family. I mean, quality time!

There is something great about spending time with others. I tell you, there is. If you think that you can have a full degree of happiness alone, you are jokingly on your way to depression. Don’t be deceived with this idea of generating happiness alone and alone. Nah, that’s invalid.

Just wait and see if nobody views your status on WhatsApp or if nobody buys your products or if nobody listens to your message. Na there you go know what’s really up!

You can generate happiness alone oh. Yes, you can. But if you want it to make more of a degree of sense and validity, try generating it with your family. That’s where the oil well of happiness is.

I, generally, don’t like moody places oh. Tah, who wants to be in a place that lacks light of laughter or happiness for one slightest joke said.

I’ve come to the knowledge of generating happiness where my family is. It is really scintillating and elating. Sometimes, if I observe how moody the presence is, I will just give a shout. Trust me that alone can make you wonder and laugh.

Parents should endeavour to spend time with their family, please. It builds them mentally, psychologically, spiritually and otherwise.

Don’t be too serious when it comes to your family Biko. Joke a little. Don’t be too busy and don’t be too caring. Balance the equation.

I pity those family that their children don’t even witness warmth hug or laughter or jokes or time with their parents. Time will tell how disastrous it will be.

Family is and will always be the first ministry God instituted on Earth. Your first pulpit should be in your home. Your first sermon should be in your home. Your first everything should be in your home. Because that’s where the battle ground is.

If the devil wants to attack a Nation he starts from the family.

Why?

Because that’s where everyone is made who he is today. A child who grows to be a politician will walk in his father’s or mother’s tutelage. And let’s take for an instance that the parents were drunkards, fighters and badly inclined, don’t you think that the child will find a meaning out of that lifestyle?

God has blessed us with all that we have. Let’s not take it away from ourselves just because we are too busy to listen to them when they needed our attention instead of gifts.

Arise, oh you family! Arise.

You can check out my website my previous article on family here:

https://www.isaiahelochukwu.com/2020/04/01/a-message-to-the-parents-episode-one/

Shalom!

What you will eventually experience after the lockdown

It has not been an easy treat as the weeks pass by. People are deeply lamenting over the courses this wave is taking us through. No joke.

If you are not experiencing this shift then reach out to other people that are experiencing this storm. It has been one tide to another and believe me the help you will render now will never be forgotten.

Sometimes I put the definition of Love as giving.

Why?

Because that’s what we received when we were born.

Due to the lockdown saga a lot of experiences will be met. Some will increase and decrease you. But whichever one, how determined you are to pass each phase will guarantee excellent results for you.

I was just thinking when I got this idea of what people will experience after this lockdown saga.

To some it will be a testimony, but to some it will be a test.

Here are the experiences you will have after this Lockdown.

P.S: I categorically placed it so that you will know where your own hanger is.

Let’s begin with the Family.
This is what they will experience or discover after this Lockdown.

Family

Research has it that a lot of marriages are on the verge of breaking and children loosing their parental values due to lack of communication, trust and intimacy.

Before this Lockdown, we’ve had a busy week. From one contract to another, trade to another and so forth. Due to this busy-ness, some might not have time to build a solid relationship with their wife, children and family as the case may be.

A ‘Thank God’ to God for a bit of come back  reasoning through this effect of Lockdown.

Because, at the end of this Lockdown, dead bones will rise again! Alleluia!

A man that does not have time for his wife and that sense of intimacy absent will certainly surface and be present.

Parents that does not have time for their children due to busy schedules will develop a strong bond with their children. This will go a long way in saving the future of those kids. Believe me, I know this.

I’ve seen a lot of videos popping up in social media where parents play with their children. I’m always happy seeing that. The joy, I experience, is wonderful. That ‘little’ game or play or prayer they make together with their parent is shaping the destiny of those kids. No doubt.

Business men and women.

Productivity they say is never upon a man or woman who does not realises his progress. Productivity in business, I will say, is proportional to progress.

Some Business men and women, Entrepreneurs too, have been experiencing a certain version of ‘sales lockdown’ or ‘productivity lockdown’ before this official Lockdown we are now experiencing. Perhaps it is due to a mishap or maybe a formula not well used or launched.

However, after this Lockdown, for those who will engage on themselves the more: studying their businesses, reading related books in that field, making reasonable efforts to expand their productivity and creativity, will come out to an increase in sales, profits and signing more deals.

Youths.


Being a youth is one stage of life that is very critical. This is a phase where pleasurable adventures are palpable, tricky and attractive.

Perhaps you’ve been experiencing a ‘mental, psychological, emotional and spiritual Lockdown’ due to busy schedules or work.

Or perhaps you are experiencing such aforementioned as a result of peer pressure, social media pressure, societal pressure, community pressure and all the pressure you can think of. Funny, I guess.

After this official Lockdown, you will be able to escape all those things and come out a new you if only you make use of this time to engage yourself mentally, psychologically, emotionally and otherwise.

How much do I know myself?

What skills do I have?

What value can I add to my society, community and country?

Those and many more are questions you can answer during this period.

Hope you got value?

KNOWLEDGE IS NOT POWER.

What will you choose, between bread and knowledge?

A lot has been going on lately. People have been retaliating over the stay at home and be safe issue. To be frank with you, it is not easy staying home when there is no food in the kitchen. How will the family survive. That’s a trauma that God will surely save us from.

It is clearly stated in His word, that the children of the righteous will not be seen begging for bread. God’s word will not pass away without coming to fulfillment. Amen! That’s his word too. I believe, so do you.

At the beginning of this post a question was asked. (You can go back and read again to be sure what your answer will be. Have that in mind as you go through this post, perhaps your answer will change.)

The situation a man finds himself defines his actions. I guess you’ve heard this sentence before. I concur. You did, don’t deny.

But

There is this new one that you won’t probably hear people say much. ‘The situation a man finds himself defines his actions according to the knowledge he has’.

Knowledge there happens to be a big word. Let say ‘The situation a man finds himself defines his actions according to the information he bear’.

What do you think? Okay right?

Do you know that some people are making it in this situation.

Do you know that some people are never going to go hungry.

Do you know that some people are going hungry now.

This is a reality and no one will say he is better off the way he is because you never can tell what will befall next.

However, nobody has the right to castigate anybody for the situation they find themselves in. Rather, they should admonish, strengthen, encourage and take up the responsibility at hand. That will go a long way in resolving the situation in future.

Those that are currently making it now has something others don’t. What they have is actually the key that makes a way for them. A gift called knowledge.

A gift is a present willingly given to someone out of love. That’s the way I see it.

But

In this context, a gift called knowledge is something, substantial in nature, given to someone out of the abundance of love in expectation of a return that is, not necessarily, as deserved by the author of the words.

Knowledge is a gift that a lot of people don’t value and because it is not valued, people don’t access what it has to offer.

On the other hand, bread is a gift that takes away something for a while, which is hunger.

The bakery is a place where all kinds of baking are done; bread, cakes, and so on.

You see, knowledge gives you certain privileges about a certain thing. Someone that has the knowledge of how to bake bread is certain about how to bake bread. Someone that has the knowledge of how to make money through marketing is certain about it. Someone who has the knowledge of how to fix a laptop will not be certain about how to fix a fridge or television set except he acquires the knowledge (skill) through experience.

One of the key principles through knowledge is grabbed is through experiences, most times it is through reading.

Actually what sinks the knowledge into somebody’s memory is when the individual goes on practical concerning it. This will enable the individual to become an expert, not only theoretically but in practical. No wonder employers emphasize greatly on work experience. Yes you can drive, but in practical not theoretical.

Companies always trust people with experience more than people with theories.

Why? Because they believe that practice makes perfect. Though they believe that theories may inspire practicalities but in actual sense, experience inspires theoretical the more.

For instance, reports in engineering field are mostly based on practicality than theoretical. Reason being that practicals inspires the theoretical aspect the more.

In actual human sense when someone makes an approach to sell a health care product or market something else, the first question that pops up in your mind will be ‘is that real, have you tried it, is it working’.

Those are ways of satisfying your curiosity that what you are being convinced of is actually working. You might even go to the extent of getting a sample to experience its effect.

The influence that knowledge give can not over emphasized. Knowledge is power. Yes it is, but the application of the knowledge is what gives power.

Let’s say a scenario where you have the knowledge that reading is a way out of ignorance. Well, you know much about that.

Your approach towards it, that is – applying it thus – gives you the actual power over ignorance.

The application of knowledge is known as wisdom. That’s right.

One thing is knowing and the other is applying.

Application comes from understanding. So, a person who has a knowledge is powerless except (s)he understands it. It is the understanding that will inspire right application and hence implies wisdom.

Hope you got value?


Thanks to @Sarpxs for making this photo available freely on @unsplash 🎁

WHY BOOKS?


Some people kind of have this attitude of no regard for books. Most especially books that can impact their lives.

It is not debated that ignorance lives with someone who appreciates it’s relevance. A scholar said rightly that to be ignorant is to be dead: locking yourself away from the rich life literacy and information would give.

Literacy in this context is not how far you have gone in schooling but in education.

Information is the facts gathered about something: existent or not in existent.

Some definition of information includes the word knowledge.

Knowledge is the information you acquire or gain from experiences or education.

These words are interwoven with each other and won’t probably function outside the other.

However, the sources of information is book, journals, reports, articles and so forth.

From this, you will conceive that knowledge and information is found in books and if so, then the importance of books cannot be over emphasized.

A book is somewhat eternal that can earn you freedom from ignorance. This will help you earn a ‘Right’ against Ignorance and mediocrity. Books keep you distinguished from Everybody.

Why?

What you Read takes part in Forming you. It fills you. It assists in patterning our behaviours.

I’ve got a lot of books that have inspired me and hence caused a change in my life.

Books like;

  • Think Big, Ben Carson
  • Understanding your destiny, Etim Isreal
  • Talent is never enough, John .C. maxwell
  • You are God’s battle axe, Benson Idahoso
  • Discipline your tongue, Fada J.C Atado
  • The prayer that heals, Francis MacNUTT
  • The power of character in Leadership, Myles Munroe
  • Rising above limitations, Michael igomu and so on

Books are relevant: to keep you enriched with Words and Vocabularies, to help you speak eloquently, to help you think vastly, to expose you into adventures only you can relate to and understand plainly.

They also create a fiction world where you seat and communicate with the writer.

It keeps you connected with the mindset of positivity and stages you ready for the situations laying ahead in your life’s journey. This actually depends on the books you read.

“Reading a book is a way out of ignorance”.

Today, I charge you to get a book and read. You will go far and do more.

But,

First of all, get the book that gives Life, the BIBLE: it reproofs, corrects and instructs.


Thanks to Laura Kapfer for making this photo available freely on @unsplash 🎁

Are you bored by the Lockdown? Then you have to Read this now

I’ve been seeing updates here and there concerning different Lockdown results. They are all good. But I will like to suggest more of what you should do during this lockdown and I assure you that it will never bring regret nor pain to you in the future.

I’ve got five engaging principles that will make your lockdown one of a kind. Lockdown doesn’t mean that everything about you should be on lock down. It also means that some part of your life should be worked on.

Sometimes this lockdown sounds like ‘We’ve been very busy with life, why not try living the life’.

Instead of being and staying bored, go through this.

PLANNING

The lockdown has given us a chance of going back to our dashboard to view our settings. Think about running an outdated app. The app won’t have new features of the recently updated one. This lockdown, I believe, should make you update our plans. The opportunity is already here, you should grab it.

EXAMINATION

In school, mostly at the end of the term, a student’s knowledge is always examined by setting up a system that does such. Now is the time for such in your life. You should examine how effective and efficient you have been in your life for the past years and grade yourself towards becoming a better personality come next phase.

STRATEGY

In a time like this, I think you should recheck your strategy. No productivity without a reviewed strategy. Think about getting it right this time, think about setting up a strategic approach this time around.

INVESTMENT

Of the busy time you’ve been having and all that, this is a time to invest in your self, in your capacity to do things you never thought of doing. In Whatever you do, now is the time to get a book related to that field and devour it. You can Google such books in line with your field of endeavour and study it. This will go a long way in changing your life.

What you should further invest in

Invest in your Family. Spend time with your children; know more about them, know what they have been going through, know how fair life has been with them. Use this time to dig more into their lives and see how things have been.

What about your wife? Talk more. Spend more time together. Know yourselves the better and patch up any hole that was left open.

Are you single? You are not left out. Get a book on self improvement. Study it. Improve yourself and get better at what you can do. Grow your expertise. Grow your connections. Explore more and gather more knowledge.

Connect with your extended family. Get in touch with them to know what’s up with them. Your neighbours shouldn’t be left behind too. Give to those you are better than. Spread love. Love and Cherish more.

RESPONSIBILITY

I see responsibility as the ability to respond to situations in a matured way. Knowledge they say is power. But the real power comes from the application of it; that’s the wisdom.


Thanks to Andre Guerra for making this photo available freely on @unsplash 🎁

A Message to the Parents – Episode one

Dear Parents,

Attention is what your children need not your gifts. If they had wanted the gifts they could have asked for it and if they ask,you will not be able to afford it in the market because it is within you. And the only way you can give them is by showing them the attention. The gift is Love! That feeling and presence that resurrects the Man and Woman in them.

Spank them and discipline them but do not forget to offer them this free gift with which you will make them better parents like you in the future.

Remember this;

Business and church is come to stay. But your children won’t remain children forever. They will someday grow and become parents like you. And for them to be able to walk closer and in the way of the Lord, you need to start now by giving them the attention and proper Godly training and upbringing they need.

The future depends on this responsibility.


Thanks to @cybernal for making this photo available freely on @unsplash 🎁